I am completely unable to resist giving you a little more wit
and wisdom from yesterday’s source - The Belgian
Cookbook (New York, 1915) by Mrs. Brian Luck, who had the bad luck herself
not to be known by her own first name.
PART II
The second half of this little
book is composed chiefly of recipes for dishes that can be made in haste, and
by the inexperienced cook. But such cook can hardly pay too much attention to
details if she does not wish to revert to an early, not to say feral type of
cuisine, where the roots were eaten raw while the meat was burnt. Because your
dining-room furniture is Early English, there is no reason why the cooking
should be early English too. And it certainly will be, unless one takes great
trouble with detail.
Let us suppose that at 7.30 P. M.
your husband telephones that he is bringing a friend to dine at 8. Let us
suppose an even more rash act. He arrives at 7.15, he brings a friend: you
perceive the unexpressed corollary that the dinner must be better than usual.
In such a moment of poignant surprise, let fly your best smile (the kind that
is practiced by bachelors' widows) and say "I am delighted you have come
like this; do you mind eight or a quarter past for dinner? '' Then melt away to
the cook with this very book in your hand.
I take it that you consider her
to be the junior partner in the household, you, of course, being the senior,
and your husband the sleeping partner in it. Ask what there is in the house for
an extra dish, and I wager you the whole solar system to a burnt match that you
will find in these pages the very recipe that fits the case. A piece of cold
veal, viewed with an eye to futurity, resolves itself into a white creamy
delightfulness that melts in your mouth; a new-laid egg, maybe, poached on the
top, and all set in a china shell. If you have no meat at all, you must simply
hoodwink your friends with the fish and vegetables.
You know the story of the great
Frenchwoman:
“Helas, Annette, I have some
gentlemen coming to dine, and we have no meat in the house. What to do?"
"Ah! Madame, I will cook at
my best; and if Madame will talk at her best, they will never notice there is
anything wrong."
But for the present day, I would
recommend rather that the gentlemen be beguiled into doing the talking
themselves, if any shortcoming in the menu is to be concealed from them, for
then their attention will be engaged.
It takes away from the
made-in-a-hurry look of a dish if it is decorated, and there are plenty of
motifs in that way besides parsley. One can use beetroot, radishes, carrots cut
in dice, minced pickles, sieved egg; and for sweets, besides the usual
preserved cherries and angelica, you can have strips of lemon peel, almonds
pointed or chopped, stoned prunes cut in halves, wild strawberries, portions of
tangerine orange. There is a saying,
Polish
the shoe,
Though
the sole be through,
and a very simple chocolate shape
may be made attractive by being garnished with a cluster of pointed almonds in
the center, surrounded by a ring of tangerine pieces, well skinned and laid
like tiny crescents one after the other. There is nothing so small and
insignificant but has great possibilities. Did not Darwin raise eighty
seedlings from a single clod of earth taken from a bird’s foot?
It is to be regretted that Samuel
Johnson never wrote the manual that he contemplated. "Sir," he said,
"I could write a better book of cookery than has ever yet been written. It
should be a book on philosophical principles."
Perhaps the pies of Fleet Street
reminded him of the Black Broth of the Spartans which the well-fed Dionysius
found excessively nasty; the tyrant was curtly told that it was nothing indeed
without the seasoning of fatigue and hunger. We do not wish a meal to owe its
relish solely to the influence of extreme hunger — it must have a beautiful
nature all its own, it must exhibit the idea of Thing-in-Itself in an easily
assimilable form.
I am convinced, anyhow, that this
little collection (formed through the kindness of our Belgian friends) will
work miracles; for there are plenty of miracles worked nowadays, though not by
those romantic souls who think that things come by themselves. Good dinners
certainly do not, and I end with this couplet :
A douce
woman and a fu' wame
Maks King
and cottar bide at hame.
Which, being interpreted, means
that if you want a man to stay at home, you must agree with him and so must his
dinner.
I do love
that phrase “There is nothing so small and insignificant but has great
possibilities.” Here are two recipes from the book to assist Good Cook and Good
Wives everywhere (whatever their gender, marital and occupational status,
philosophical stance, or feelings about cold mutton) to put food on the table
three times a day.
The Good Wife’s Sauce
This sauce is indispensable to
anyone who wishes to use up slices of cold mutton. Trim your slices, take away
skin and fat and pour on them the following cold sauce. Hard-boil three eggs,
let them get cold. Crumble the yolks in a cup, adding slowly a tablespoonful of
oil, salt, pepper, a little mustard, a teaspoonful of vinegar; then chop the
whites of egg, with a scrap of onion, and if you have them, some capers. Mix
all together and pour it over the cold meat.
Rum Omelette
This simple dish is much liked by
gentlemen.
Break five eggs in a basin,
sweeten them with castor sugar, pour in a sherry glassful of rum. Beat them
very hard till they froth. Put a bit of fresh butter in a shallow pan and pour
in your eggs. Let it stay on the fire just three minutes and then slip it off
on to a hot dish. Powder it with sugar, as you take it to the dining-room. At
the dining-room door, set a light to a big spoonful of rum and pour it over the
omelette just as you go in. It is almost impossible to light a glass of rum in
a hurry, for your omelette, so use a kitchen spoon.
4 comments:
I'm a little mystified by the interpretation that "fu' wame" refers to a meal. Isn't it Scots for "a full womb"? Meaning pregnant?
Hi Foose - good point. I will see if I can find anything in the Scottish Language Dictionary. Who knows what else I might find there as fodder for another post while I am there!
in Scots, wame is the stomach. which said, could be used as slang for the womb.
in Scots wame is the stomach. that said, used as slang it can refer to the womb. much as we do with the term 'belly.'
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