TO THE RIGHT
HONOURABLE
THE MAYOR AND
ALDERMEN
OF THE CITY OF
LONDON,
THE HUMBLE PETITION
OF THE COLLIERS, COOKS, COOKMAIDS, BLACKSMITHS, JACKMAKERS, BRAZIERS., AND
OTHERS,
Sheweth, - That whereas certain virtuosi, disaffected to the government
and to the trade and prosperity of this kingdom, taking upon them the name and
title of the CATOPTRICAL VICTUALLERS*, have presumed by gathering, breaking,
folding, and bundling up the sun-beams,
by the help of certain glasses, to
make, produce, and kindle up several new focus’s
or fires within these his majesty's dominions, and there to boil, bake, stew,
fry, and dress all sorts of victuals and provisions, to brew, distil spirits,
smelt ore, and in general to perform all the offices of culinary fires, and are
endeavouring to procure to themselves the monopoly of this their said
invention: We beg leave humbly to represent to your honours,
That such grant or patent will utterly ruin
and reduce to beggary your petitioners, their wives, children, servants, and
trades on them depending, there being nothing left to them after the said
invention but warming of cellars and dressing of suppers in the winter-time.
That the abolishing of so considerable a branch of the coasting trade as that
of the colliers will destroy the navigation
of this kingdom. That whereas the said catoptrical
victuallers talk of making use of the moon by night as of the sun by day,
they will utterly ruin the numerous body of tallow-chandlers,
and impair a very considerable branch of the revenue which arises from the tax
upon tallow and candles.
That the said catoptrical victuallers do profane the emanations of that glorious
luminary the sun, which is appointed
to rule the day, and not to roast mutton. And we humbly conceive it
will be found contrary to the known laws of this kingdom to confine, forestal,
and monopolise the beams of the sun. And whereas the said catoptrical victuallers have undertaken, by burning glasses made of
ice, to roast an ox upon the Thames next
winter: we conceive all such practices to be an encroachment upon the rights
and privileges of the company of watermen.
That the diversity of exposition of the
several kitchens in this great city, whereby some receive the rays of the sun
sooner, and others later, will occasion great irregularity as to the time of
dining of the several inhabitants, and consequently great uncertainty and
confusion in the despatch of business; and to those who, by reason of their
northern exposition, will be still forced to be at the expense of culinary
fires, it will reduce the price of their manufacture to such inequality as is
inconsistent with common justice; and the same inconveniency will affect landlords in the value of their rents.
That the use of the said glasses will oblige
cooks and cook-maids to study optics and astronomy in order to know the due
distance of the said focus’s or
fires, and to adjust the position of their glasses to the several altitudes of
the sun, varying according to the hours of the day and the seasons of the year;
which studies at these years will be highly troublesome to the said cooks and
cook-maids, not to say anything of the utter incapacity of some of them to go
through with such difficult arts; or (which is still a greater inconvenience)
it will throw the whole art of cookery
into the hands of astronomers und glass-grinders, persons utterly unskilled in
other parts of that profession, to the great detriment of the health of his majesty's good subjects.
That it is known by experience that meat
roasted with sun-beams is extremely unwholesome; witness several that have died
suddenly after eating the provisions of the said catoptrical victuallers; forasmuch as the sunbeams taken inwardly
render the humours too hot and adust, occasion great sweatings, and dry up the
rectual moisture.
That sun-beams taken inwardly shed a malignant influence upon the brain by their natural tendency toward the moon, and produce madness and distraction at the time of the full
moon. That the constant use of so great quantities of this inward light will occasion the growth of quakerism to the danger of the church, and of poetry to the danger
of the state.
That the influences of the constellations
through which the sun passes will with his beams be conveyed into the blood;
and when the sun is among the horned signs may produce such a spirit of unchastity as is dangerous to the honour
of your worships' families.
That mankind, living much upon the seeds and
other parts of plants, these, being impregnated with the sunbeams, may vegetate and grow in the bowels, a thing of more dangerous consequence to human
bodies than breeding of worms; and this will fall heaviest upon the poor, who
live upon roots, and the weak and sickly, who live upon barley and rice gruel, etc., for which we are ready to produce
to your honours the opinions of eminent physicians that the taste and property
of the victuals is much altered to the worse by the said solar cookery, the fricassees being deprived of the haut goût they acquire by being dressed
over charcoal.
Lastly, should it happen by an eclipse of an
extraordinary length that this city should be deprived of the sun-beams for
several months, how will his majesty's subjects subsist in the interim, when
common cookery, with the arts depending upon it, is totally lost 1
In consideration of these and many other
inconveniences, your petitioners humbly pray that your honours would either
totally prohibit the confining and manufacturing the sun-beams for any of the useful purposes of life, or, in the
ensuing parliament, procure a tax to be
laid upon them, which may answer both the duty and price of coals, and
which we humbly conceive cannot be less than thirty shillings per yard square; reserving the sole
right and privilege of the catoptrical
cookery to the Royal Society, and to the commanders and crews of the bomb-vessels
under the direction of Mr. Whiston, for finding out the
longitude, who by reason of the remoteness of their stations may be reduced to
straits for want of firing.
And we likewise beg that your honours, as to
the aforementioned points, would hear the reverend Mr. Flamstead, who is the legal officer appointed by the government
to look after the heavenly luminaries,
whom we have constituted our trusty and learned solicitor.
[*relating to a mirror or to reflexion]
Recipe for the Day.
In honour of the inimitable Dean Swift, I give you a recipe from the
incomparable Eliza Acton.
TO BOIL POTATOES.
(A genuine Irish Receipt.)
Potatoes, to boil well
together, should be all of the same sort, and as nearly equal in size as may
be. Wash off the mould, and scrub them very clean with a hard brush, but
neither scoop nor apply a knife to them in any way, even to clear the eyes.*
Rinse them well, and arrange them compactly in a saucepan, so that they may not
lie loose in the water, and that a small quantity may suffice to cover them.
Pour this in cold, and when it boils, throw in about a large teaspoonful of
salt to the quart, and simmer the potatoes until they are nearly done, but for
the last two or three minutes let them boil rapidly. When they are tender quite
through, which may be known by probing them with a fork, pour all the water from
them immediately, lift the lid of the saucepan to allow the steam to escape,
and place them on a trevet, high over the fire, or by the side of it, until
the moisture has entirely evaporated; then peel, and send them to table as
quickly as possible, either in a hot napkin, or in a dish, of which the cover
is so placed that the steam can pass off. There should be no delay in serving
them after they are once taken from the fire: Irish families usually prefer
them served in their skins. Some kinds will be done in twenty minutes, others
in less than three quarters of an hour. We are informed that "the best potatoes
are those which average from five to six to the pound, with few eyes, but those
pretty deep, and equally distributed over the surface." We cannot
ourselves vouch for the correctness of the assertion, but we think it may be
relied on. .
20 minutes to
¾ hour, or more.
Obs. —The
water in which they are boiled should barely cover the potatoes.
*"Because," in
the words of our clever Irish correspondent," the water through these
parts is then admitted into the very heart of the vegetable; and the latent
heat, after cooking, is not sufficient to throw it off: this renders the
potatoes very unwholesome."
Modern
Cookery in All its Branches (1845)
Quotation for the Day.
This brings to my mind the known story of a Scotchman, who, receiving the sentence of death with all the
circumstances of hanging, beheading,
quartering, embowelling, and the like, cried out, What need all this
COOKERY?
Jonathan Swift.
2 comments:
Admirably detailed but concise instructions from Miss Acton. A relevant point to everything she says & nothing omitted. And a question (answered) to the one point she does not understand.
She is a marvel, isnt she? I wonder what she was like, really? Thorough and careful and practical, or a tedious pedant? Has anyone written her bio?
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